Christmas and all that

Sheldon and I are pretty sure we want to have another baby after this one (in a few years, obviously) and I fully intend to take everything I learned from this pregnancy and make my next pregnant holiday season A LOT better.

This was the game plan: Christmas Eve night with my in laws, Christmas morning in newlywed alonetime bliss, Christmas afternoon/evening with my family, big Christmas with the kids on the 28th. The general timeline went, for the most part, as planned. But it was not smooth and it was frequently not merry. Lesson learned.

Christmas Eve, we caught a break (the only one of the season) and Sheldon was sent out on a job that let him out early. He got home around 4:30, so we were actually on time (a tremendous feat for us... seriously.) and TOGETHER to his aunt and uncle's house for dinner and festivities. The thing about being 5 months pregnant is that by 8 or 9pm, if I've been up since 6am and doing stuff the entire day, my body starts to crap out. I get sore and it takes me a good minute to stand from comfy chairs. Other than the achy body, it was nice. Delicious tamales, family sing-a-long, and an amazing new camera from the parents.

(this is Sheldon's youngest brother rocking the NERF dart tag we got him. It was way cooler than we ever anticipated.)


The thing about Christmas day is that this year was the only year Sheldon and I would have together without kids. No Santa pressure, no early morning, etc. Just the 2 of us, being together and enjoying each other. Not that I don't love being a mom, its just couple time is so important and this Christmas was a lot of firsts for me. We'd been getting fired up for it for like a month. I'd gone and purchased the ingredients to make a big awesome breakfast for us. No alarm clocks. BLISS. Well, then the phone rang at 5am and Sheldon got called out for a job. The guy who was 1st up and supposed to go ignored his phone (and then lied to Sheldon about it later.) That amazing Christmas morning shattered. Cue the preggo hormones and an hour and a half of crying. My brother picked me up at 1:30 to go have dinner at our aunt's house. There were a lot of not nice comments made (which I obviously added to my "I'm already in a bad mood and having a bad day" bank). Sheldon finally made it home around 8, we got to talk to the kids, and passed out, just happy to finally be together. Not my best Christmas day. (we had our big breakfast the next morning.)

(watching my beautiful nephew Isaac go off on a candy cane was a classic Christmas moment.)



Fast forward to Monday. My lunch did not sit well. It resulted in a violent rejection from my stomach. And pretty much everything else that I tried to eat. Until Tuesday morning, while I was still unable to keep things in my stomach. I called in sick, drank a crapton of water, and embraced my anti-nausea meds. I felt shaky but still made it to pick up the kids at noon. We had lunch at Zaxby's (and they were awesomely still playing Christmas music!), then headed home for the gift bonanza. They started with their gifts from us. Then they moved on to Santa. Basically, they got spoiled out of their little minds. My parents and my brother and his family came over for dinner and there was more gift giving. Even Eli got some presents! It was a big awesome day and fully lived up to the hype of Christmas.

Spoiled. Rotten.


Next year, Sheldon will be turning in his vacation request for Christmas Eve and day in October. He will be there for all 48 hours of Eli's 1st Christmas. The 5 of us will be spending the weekend together, as a family. It might be the best Christmas of my entire life. 2011 is set up to be full of awesome things for the Green family, and to end it like that will be the stuff that dreams are made of.

Pink or Blue?!

Its not just that I'm a bad blogger lately. We moved on December 1st and still don't have internet at home. Our modem came yesterday, so any day now, really. In the mean time...

We are really excited that Baby Green has a name, and it is no longer Promise (which was our nickname - We believed from the time we got engaged that God would bless us with a child together, that He promised that to us.). Well, we're 90% sure about this name anyway...

Because I don't like taking off from my part time job for appointments, and because my doctor only sees patients at the Katy office until noon on Wednesdays (they have 2 other offices in the Houston area he divides his time with), I am very good at getting the 11:30 slot, which is his last one. That means he, knowing I love them and that he's in no hurry, pretty much always does an ultrasound. At 16 weeks, I got reaaaaally excited about getting that peek. It was right around my birthday, and I have not enjoyed the anticipation of not knowing the gender of my little bonus passenger. So my doctor obliged and we took a peek. This child was having none of it. Literally. Squeezed the legs together, rolled over, and gave us a thumbs up. I told my sister that obviously the baby is already in love with Aunt Katy and her aggie ways. She agrees. My doctor told us 18 weeks would be easier to check, and we'd do a more thorough ultrasound. I got PUMPED. We arrived for our 18 week check up like it was Christmas morning. Seriously. I was hardly able to sit still all morning. When the nurse came in with the doppler, she told us he hadn't order the big gender scan. I was NOT happy. We had our visit with the doctor, and he said, "Well, its still so early. We'll have the big gender scan in 2 more weeks. *notices my frown* But let's go take a look." So we head across the hall to the ultrasound room. We looked at a precious head and face. (btw - I was negative across the board on my triple screen. No risk for Downs Syndrome, Spina Bifida, and whatever the 3rd one is. Not that it would make us love our child less, but we did high 5 when he told us.) We looked at a sweet little belly and all I could think was how much I can't wait to tickle and kiss that belly. Then we moved to the legs. "The legs are always the hardest part." This child is still not a cooperator. There was this precious little foot that did not want to move! My doctor shook the wand on my belly (which doesn't feel that great, fyi. Especially since my placenta is apparently towards the front and made the doppler difficult. I was already sore from all that poking.) Foot still wouldn't move. So I rolled on my side and we went at it from a different angle. More wand jiggles (and grimaces from Mommy.) Nope. That foot was THERE. So that's why we only have a 90% sure on the gender. We go back on the 29th for that big gender scan (and have to go to the main office at the hospital) and we'll get a for sure confirmation on gender. I'm actually ridiculously excited about that ultrasound because Cherie and Owen will be with us for Christmas visitation then, and they'll be joining us at the appointment. I can't wait for them to see the baby, to watch those tiny arms move around and see that there is a real person in my belly. I feel like it's going to make it all so much more real for them, and it will also give them more of a sense of ownership of their new sibling. Baby will become something real that they've seen instead of just something we talk about and they pray for.

With that being said, our little miracle's name is Elijah Ross Green, or Eli. When my doctor said, (after "I'm 90% sure" of course,) "it's a boy!", Hubs was overcome. He's been saying boy the entire time, and his intuition was apparently correct. He's so happy there were some tears, which I find beyond adorable.

I'm not cray cray or anything, but there's something about being pregnant with a boy at Christmas. We spend a tremendous portion of the season remembering what it really is all about, why we have a holiday in the first place, and that is a baby boy who was born into NOTHING and gave us EVERYTHING. When I hear the story, or even just phrases like, "Mary's baby boy", I feel this surge of emotion. And I know my son is not Jesus. He is not the 2nd coming of the Savior of the World. He will just be my baby, and while God has big plans for his life, it's not the same. But I can't not touch my belly and feel slightly more in love with my child when I think of that baby boy born 2000 years ago.

I have other stuff I want to write about, but Isaac just woke up from his nap and I'm on Aunt Suzy duty. What a hard duty it is... hehehe

oh, hi

So, I'm 4 months pregnant, and that's fun. Actually being pregnant isn't the most fun thing I've ever done, but it's so worth it. My throwing up hasn't gone away, but its gotten soooooooooooo much better since we leveled up into the 2nd trimester. I now only throw up once or twice every day or 2, and I'm not nauseous 24/7 anymore. In its place, unfortunately, we have The Headache. It started peaking in at the tail end of my 1st trimester, but then came in with a bang during my 13th week. Like, exploded into a migraine so huge I spent Wednesday-Friday in the hospital, in the dark, with an IV and an assortment of pain meds. The neurologist had them do a CT scan because he could see the fluid/pressure build up behind my eyes. Thankfully, they didn't see anything, but I spent a week on steroids to be safe. Its been 3 weeks and I'm still getting lots of headaches (and 2 or 3 migraines.) Since I've been getting migraines since I was 18 and my neurologist in Dallas informed me that its due to hormone sensitivity, my doctor gently broke the bad news that this was going to be my reality for the duration of my pregnancy. At least he gave me 2 levels of pain meds to try and control it. I have my 16 week check up in the morning, and we're hoping my doctor is true to his word and does an ultrasound so I can know if its my son or my daughter making me feel so yucky!

Other exciting changes... after 8 months of marriage, I finally got around to changing my name on my driver's license. I took Cherie with me and she enjoyed the experience way more than anyone I know. Her good time made me enjoy it a lot, too. When we got there, I discovered that I have Homeland Security flags attached to my social security number. When I got married the first time, I went to the social security office to change my name, found out I didn't have all the required documents, and then never got around to going back. Sooo as far as they are concerned, my last name is still Hall. Whoopsie! It's on my to-do list next week. I'd do it this week, but I'm really wrapped up in the other exciting change we've got going on... we finally got our own place! My mom really doesn't need help anymore, so we've been working on finding a place of our own for months. There was A LOT of drama that went along with it, but finally, God blessed us with a fantastic place, and we're slowly but surely getting all of our stuff transferred over from my parents' house. (For the record, it sucks to move while you're pregnant. I feel really really useless.) We got our keys on my birthday (oh yea, I turned 29 in there) and it was the best birthday gift Hubs could have possibly given me.

Owen's still acting up a lot, and its heartbreaking. Today he got an N because he refused to follow instructions and threw rocks at other kids on the playground. he's about to get a lot more structure and routine during his time with us, thanks to the new place. I'm hoping that a combo of that and more time with Daddy will encourage a change. It frequently feels like spitting into the wind because every time we make progress, it gets destroyed when he goes back to her house. God has a plan with this, and someday, He'll share that. In the mean time... whew!

So yea, my belly's growing, we're settling into our first married home together, and in general, we feel exceptionally blessed.

the blog post I have always wanted to write

I've been pretty busy lately, and it's a task I'll be pretty busy with for a while longer. I'm helping to create something. Its a "project" we've been working on for almost 3 months now. Let me show you some pictures of this amazing work in progress...




















That's right. We're expecting a little miracle in May. We had nooooo idea we'd get pregnant again so fast after losing the baby in July. I'm sad to say that I didn't feel the same overwhelming excitement this time around that we felt last time, but I know its because I was so scared to feel the disappointment I felt. But since the worry has left, I'm there now.

We've already been through some trials with this pregnancy, including my 3 day hospital stay at 6 weeks (Nothing serious: just getting some meds tweaked in a controlled environment.). My doctor is very aggressive and has been amazing in helping us do everything we can to give this baby the best possible chance. We were so blessed to have weekly ultrasounds for most of the first trimester - 5 total. It was incredibly bittersweet when my doctor told me we didn't need them anymore. Horns up: your baby is doing fantastic! Horns down: you don't get to see Baby grow and change every week. Watching how much things change in a week is nothing short of mind blowing! And you better believe that I cried the first time I watched that precious little heart beat!! My doctor isn't at all worried about another miscarriage and has shifted his focus to all the risks I'm facing down the road. There's no guarantee that I will have any of those complications, but we went into this knowing I was high risk, so better safe than sorry. The only guarantee he's given us is that I will delivery before 40 weeks, so that's cool. We'd love to have the baby on Earth Day... hahaha get it? the Green Baby born on Earth Day!

To answer some of the most common questions...

1. "How are you feeling?" Pretty terrible, actually. I've been throwing up since before I had a positive pregnancy test. (which means we went and bought a bunch of tests at the dollar store and my morning ritual became to test. I made the decision that I would keep testing until I either got a positive or stopped throwing up). This method does make the positive a little anticlimactic, fyi. But its better than just throwing up for no reason. Anyway, I've had like 5 positives (I wanted to be really sure at home, and then they also test at the OB's office), and I haven't stopped throwing up. I'm hoping that we're almost done with this part, but I have some friends who were sick until their third trimester or their entire pregnancy. I also have terrible heartburn and lots of the physical aches and pains. I've actually been losing weight (which my doctor is fine with this early, plus they don't want me to gain much anyway) As crappy as I feel, its totally worth it. I'm in love with this little sea monkey.

2. "Boy or girl?" Obviously, we don't know yet. We'll find out in December. And oh yes, we are totally finding out. Its driving me nuts not knowing! I have no idea how people can stand not knowing! As for what I hope it is, I honestly don't care. I always thought I wanted a girl, but now that it's a reality, I don't care. I mean, I would really enjoy having my own little doll to put in tutus and precious little girl outfits, but boys are fun, too. Sheldon is convinced we're having a boy, but he assures me he'll be happy either way.

3. "How do the kids feel about it?" They're SUPER excited. Cherie loves being a big sister so much as it is, and having another sibling is heaven to her. Owen's excited, too, but he's 5 so it's a different excitement. I think he might still be a little confused about what happened to the last baby, because he's not as excited as last time. Last time, he would talk to my belly and always pray for the baby. And then again, maybe he's just not as excited because of his other underlying issues right now. But he is excited.

So yea, there it is. I'm thrilled and just know the next 20 something weeks will absolutely DRAG. I already feel like I've been pregnant forever and we're not quite 1/3 of the way through the process!

Worst. Blogger. Ever.

Its gonna be a mishmash post. That's just the way things are these days.

So, the kids have started school, and that's been going well for one of them. The other? Not so much. I don't know where my sweet little guy went but the mean kid who took his place is so not awesome. And to be perfectly honest, it's embarrassing. No one wants their kid to be the one who changes his color (almost) every day. And no one wants their kid to be a fighter. The first fight was in Sunday school with us a week and a half ago. Unfortunately for him, my classroom window looks out onto the playground. I watched him shove a little boy then stomp on his foot (Owen was in regular shoes, the other little boy was in flip flops.) I met him at the door as they were coming in, yanked him out of line and away from his classmates, gave him stern words and a swift pop on his bottom before sending him back to his classroom to apologize for what he did. Until this week, he was changing his color for talking almost every day in class. Its not like he doesn't get a warning. He just doesn't care. He does stuff like here, too. We tell him not to do something so he turns around and does it again. And again. And again. When I asked him why he was getting in trouble, he lied. And then lied again. And then just got good measure, lied again. He said Kindergarten is too much work (lie.). Then he said he was just tired of school (after 8 days? Lie. Especially since he loved school in pre-K.) And he rounded out the lie-spree with "I'm just tired of Kindergarten, and really ready for 1st grade." That's just ridiculous. He's also taken to yelling in my face when he doesn't get his way. He has yet to get an entire sentence out before that's keebashed. His behavior is getting progressively worse. He got a U in his folder today because he was talking in class, being disruptive, and fighting on the playground. We got an email from his teacher and then a phone call from ex-wife to talk about it. He's misbehaving increasingly at her house, too. She said he stomps around the house, yells, and is generally unpleasant for her, too. I don't know if its just an all of a sudden being upset that his parents are divorced, if he's acting out because his life feels fragmented and compartmentalized, or if its something else entirely. All I know is that something is seriously not right in my poor little guy's head. He has a lot of feelings that he doesn't understand and acts as a direct result. It gets really stressful, and makes it really hard to do fun family stuff. I mean, do we punish him and take away things (toys, outings, etc) or do we just carry on and hope he grows out of this?

He was a lot of fun when we all went to the Texas vs Rice game. It was their first football game, and we did it right, complete with tailgating. Yes I have pictures that will get posted later.

We're very excited about this weekend. Cherie has professed her faith is Jesus and is being baptized! She loves God, and He will use her in mighty ways throughout her life. Its very exciting to see and very humbling to be a part of teaching her to walk His path.


We have some other big changes coming up before the end of the year, and the one I'm currently most excited about is that we're finally getting a home of our own. Okay, we won't own it but I really couldn't care less. We hit a stumble in that path tonight. A house we thought was going to be The House turned out to be something of an abomination when we toured with the realtor tonight. If it was just one thing, maybe 2, I'd be fine. But it was 5 and the absolute deal breaker was the wall of windows in the master bath coupled with the glass surround in the shower. That doesn't sound bad, except that the fence is shorter than the windows and the slats have huge gaps. That means the neighbors can watch you shower. NOT COOL. I know the right house for us is there and we will find it in time to make our October move... Its gonna happen. I'm trusting God on this, and He ALWAYS delivers.

I'm gonna wrap this post up by professing my love for my husband. Lately, we've been squabbling more, but I know it has to do with me being annoyed by everything and him being stressed by a handful of things that have nothing to do with me. But through it all, he is so wonderful. He does everything he can to give me everything I've ever wanted. I love how I never have to suggest it, he always turns to prayer for everything. Having a marriage with God as the center makes all the difference, and I am super blessed to have him. K I'm done.

joy and pain

So, July has been more of a roller coaster than I ever could have imagined. I have felt the happiest I've ever felt in my life and then turned around and felt absolutely destroyed. Everything can change in an instant.

On July 2nd, Clear Blue Easy changed our lives when the little plus sign appeared. I would love to say that I shared that with Sheldon in some adorable loving way. Nope. I ran into our room and started shaking him going, "SheldonI'mpregnant!" over and over, until he finally woke up. I wanted to scream and cry and shake all at the same time. Excited doesn't even begin to cover how we felt.

I was sick to my stomach our entire trip to the beach, and the actual puking started Sunday evening. I kept being reminded that being sick is a good thing when you're pregnant. I puked and tried to sleep every spare minute for a week. And was over the moon about the little person growing inside me.

Then the ride sped up. On the 11th, we spent 4 hours at the er because I started to spot. The bleeding stopped, my hormone levels were fine, but the ultrasounds showed nothing. Literally. Nothing. That's not uncommon at 6 weeks, so they told me to follow up with my ob. We went to the ob the next day. My pelvic exam was normal, so they did some blood work to check my hormone levels. I started feeling better about the situation and let my excitement come flooding back. Tuesday the ride dropped again. My nurse left a voicemail saying my hormone levels were lower and for me to come have blood work done again. My excitement vanished. Wednesday morning, I called to get the details. She had nothing good to tell me. By lunchtime, I was full on bleeding and the physical pain had rolled in. We spent 7 hours in the hospital to leave with a prescription for vicodin and paperwork with the worst word ever as the diagnosis: miscarriage.

I've been very blessed with incredibly supportive friends and family. I don't understand why I seem to be so unable to stay pregnant. I don't understand why God took this pregnancy away from us. All I know is that He has a plan bigger than me, Sheldon, or a baby. We'll just have to try again and when the time is right, that pregnancy will make it.

bunch of stuff crammed into 1 entry without a clever title

I know. I know. I should be better about blogging. I have been slacking at uploading pictures, and the only other stuff I wanna blog about isn't really appropriate, so I basically just haven't been bothering to blog. I think I can improve. I know I can.

It's July so we have the kids for the entire month. It's such a blessing, even when they make me crazy. The longest I've gotten to be with them was the 10 days at Christmas, so this is fun. As much as I complain about our living arrangement, I've been pretty grateful for my mom when we both need to be at work. I can just let them sleep in and quietly sneak out at 7:45. That's right, Moms. My kids sleep well past 8am almost every day. The other morning, Sheldon woke them up at 9:30. Owen had been asleep for almost 13 hours at that point. Little dude was just worn out I guess!

We went down to Galveston for the weekend of the 4th with my brother's family. That's always a good time. The kids are pretty much obsessed with each other and shockingly don't fight. I'm sure they will eventually, but for now, we bask in the awesome of that. It rained pretty much the entire way down on Friday, but we woke up Saturday to beautiful sunny skies. We spent the morning at the beach, there was a short storm around lunch time, and then in the afternoon, the men set up the giant water slide pool thing for the kids to play on while they grilled some dinner. Sunday morning, we had another great morning at the beach with an afternoon of the kids on the water slide. It was a lot of fun, even if I did get burnt beyond recognition despite my liberal use and reapplication of sunblock. I'm still peeling and the blisters on my boobs make people cringe. They don't really hurt anymore. Its okay.

Sheldon was on nights this past week so I was single mommin' it in the evenings. Owen is extremely spirited and has some pretty rough days with the whole obeying, keeping his hands to himself, telling the truth, and making good decisions in general. I teetered on the edge. This past Sunday, we had a guest speaker at our church. Ben Glenn spoke a few years ago, and I really enjoyed it. When they announced he was coming back this year, I was really excited and started hyping it up to Sheldon and the kids. Little did I know that God was about to put a big ol' serving of truth in my heart. He told stories about his childhood and how his parents handled it. He told stories about his own kids. After the stressful week I'd had, it really ministered to me about patience and grace. Owen snuggled up next to me during the sermon and it just filled me how much I love the little guy, even when he pushes me to the brink. And then I started crying when he went to the prayer alter and just poured his little heart out to Jesus. It was pretty amazing.

And that's how we rock the suburbs.